He lightly stumbles as he climbs up the stairs on the front porch. As he reaches for his key, his fingers can't seem to remember which key fits the lock. So manually searches for the right one under the dim lights in the dark. The street lamps don't offer much light much a distance. But, after all, it is his own house and his own keys that he uses every time he returns home. It doesn't take more than a few seconds to unlock the door and step into the house.

The walls of his house are just plain white, but fitted with some portraits of famous people that he never really cared to remember. They were gifts from his relatives when he moved into the city. Apparently, they were some old relics lying around the attic. Tonight, those faces seemed to come to life. He swore that he could feel them gazing him with their watchful, determined eyes as he paced towards the living room.

He threw his coat a chair and slumped onto the single armchair in the room. He opened a jar filled with "M & Ms" and popped one into mouth. Before closing the lid, he gave way to a sigh and decided that he'd have a few more. So he scooped up a handful and didn't even bother to shut the jar. As the night dragged on he would come to finish that jar of treats.

It was another one of those nights. You know, those nights that just keep you awake. That night in particular, he had the most complex of things on his mind. It wasn't something like tomorrow's game. It wasn't the annoying neighbour next door either. Even lectures on quantum physics seemed miniscule to this. The thing on his mind was a girl. More aptly put, a lady. But then, a lady's only involved when there's something called love.

People turn to food to calm their nerves - sometimes. It is perhaps just like how some people choose smoking. Everyone has their own ways and methods, but that night he chose food. To be more exact, that empty jar of "M&Ms" still had its lid open. But the defeated look on his face would not leave. Not even after that much sugar. You would expect some hint of relief or maybe the infamous sugar rush to express itself. No, there wasn't anything close to that.

Instead, his eyelids started getting heavier and droplets of tears started streaking down his cheek. It started as a silent sob, but low and behold, he started moaning. Deep in the night, this man had his hands over his eyes and back bent down on his armchair. His lips were curled into a very deep frown and he even opened all his lungs to let out a scream or shout. But it never came. He was so overcome with sorrow that his speech seemed paralyzed and all he could manage was the soft moaning similar to that of a child.

He cursed his luck. It was the same every time. He was tired, so damned tired. Why was it always the same answer every time? Deluded as it may sound, but is there no creativity in rejection? Those words sunk deep. Perhaps they were deepened by how much he had invested in this venture. Men may be speaking more about money and women like a change of clothes, but when he falls in love there is nothing more important. When he makes up his mind, no care in the world will stop his resolve for an answer. Those fortunate enough to get a good match move onto greener pastures for the better of their time. But the unfortunate ones, well, they end up like our character here.

"Why God, why? You build me as such and yet slay me down every time. Are you trying to hold me to an oath of celibacy? I don't know if I can't continue like this any longer. It hurts too much. SO DAMNED MUCH!!! Damn you, damn myself for damning you, but DAMN you."

Life's a bitch
and faith is its test

No rest for the wanting

and crying will go untold

So unfold yourself from the bed sheet

And wipe the tears off your cheeks

Get yourself cleaned up for the morning

And allow yourself some believing again

Life's a bitch

and faith is its test

The best of us stay believers

And the keys lay in determination and perseverance

And though lightning strikes more than twice

Or even three, four, five, infinite times

Just goes to prove you still got what it takes to live on

So give life your everything and life will return in full

Life's a bitch

and faith is its test

Be damned sure

That bitch keeps her promises too

And to that lady, the man thanks a million for letting him know that after being struck by lightning, he's still alive. And he cries so hard in all his sorrow that he ends up laughing at his misery.