"Did you ever know... that I tried to lie.. I lied to myself, just to escape from all of this. I lied to myself, so I could think that tomorrow would be a better day. I lied... and it all just got worse. Because the next day, I wouldn't wake up with my head held high to face a brand new day; but instead, I would wake with a dreadful feeling. My chest would feel so heavy that I could hardly breath, my eyes would be just the color of losing hope and my heart... well, I wouldn't be able to feel it at that time..."
Like a room lit by just a candle...
"And today was no exception. I awoke and I tried to get up. But there was no purpose. Today was a holiday. No work... no plans. No plans... what a thought. Well, that was the whole problem. There's nothing left to fill up my time, so it all starts to come back to me. That day, I lost myself. I left the shreds of hope that I had about myself. I burnt them and watched as the ashes flew into the sky. And as the dim red embers slowly faded, they fell to the ground...lifeless and raw. That's what I had become. I burned myself trying to reach for something. I burned myself good. The scar on my soul is like an engraved tombstone. It reminds me of what happened. It leans on my chest. It makes it harder to breath. And the ashes and the remains of rotting memories, they intoxicate my mind. Life is just a distraction from what is to come. And that can only be death. I dream of becoming the end of my nightmares. I dream to be buried under that tombstone and forever put my past behind me..."
Memories don't come easy. But when they do come...sometimes it is not the ones you wish to live for that stay with you. Instead, it is the ones that bring you pain that cling on. A hero might be able to vanquish evils and the perils of danger. But it takes more than a hero to clean the soul from a mind full of misery.
Misery loves company. Too bad, that company often doesn't come. So misery remains. Alone.
