The highs and lows

They come everyday

There's only one constant

That can stand on both planes

The high flying gliding of joy

The low, stormy seas of sorrow

For me, only love remains a good company

When the day comes

That I may find someone

To share it with

I'll create a sanctuary

For just the two of us

Will the man on the moon, come down and give me some advice? I'm lying in waste on my bed, my body unwilling to move and my mind just clouded and my heart heavy. I'm suffocating on my own breath and drowning in my thoughts.

And I'll say to that man, that man from the moon, the man who sits there all lonely and watching: "Please, tell me, what of women and their wiles? Tell me why they play these games? Tell me why my heart hurts so painfully when I see them so near yet so far away?"

I must be crazy, because here I am, talking to an imaginary person who I think exists from the moon. I'm picturing him laughing away up there so high in the dark sky. And the night sky, all those stars, they blink away like a thousand watching eyes. All of the peering down on me.

And again I have to lament: "Why, oh why does this torment befall me? I have chosen to give all my secrets and I lay down my defenses and weapons. And now when I am helpless before her, it seems like it was all just a dream? What can I do to let her know how much I need her? Or is it never going to be enough and I'm just another dent in her past?"

How I wish that it was ever enough. That other side seems so alluring now. That place they call celibacy. No wine can bring an end to this. So I'll just write it on a paper and burn it to watch. Maybe that'll cure my eyes, turn me blind, make me deaf and bring me amnesia.

And yet here I still am. I'm still waiting. Like a fool. God, help me.

I have no reason to stay this way. So, Mr. Devil, if you would please, stop. I swear, if I cry, you'll weep tears worse than sorrow.

Love letters on Halloween.

I'll speak to you in a whisper

Away from anyone else

That side of me that I keep silent

From the everyday crowd

That part of me that I cherish

And treasure the most.

That part of me that brings back

A thousand memories of pain

And joy and everything between

To reopen them, now and forever

I'd go through it all over again

So, just so that you know

You're worth every second

Every beat of my heart

Every breath that I take

I keep my very best
Your's for the taking.

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Its amazing how different things can seem when you have the right people around you.

The world has a harsh reality. Any way you look at it, nothing completely works out for you. Economists might have been referring to this as the "invisible hand". But I think, for what's worth, it is really about the people that you go through life with. Events, time and all those uncontrollably complex and unpredictable things, are just side effects...or rather, sidetracks from the main idea of everything - people.

If you feel like you fit in perfectly in a crowd, it can make such a big difference. But then again, I've never looked for such perfection. I tried fitting in before, but I realized that it is more important to have your own individuality. Not everything belongs to yourself, but not everything belongs to society either. You share and coexist together in a dialectic of things.

I think it means the world to me, when there's someone like you out there that can make me feel like tomorrow, is definitely worth waiting for. I definitely, would like that. It only makes sense, because my hollowness comes from my heart. So what else would I be pursuing? What better reason should I have? In fact, there's nothing else to say. Gladly, with all my heart, mind and soul... I could live just to see you happy.

I'd only be fair, because without doing anything at all you made me smile inside. I hope you can see that too. I hope you find out. I'll only waiting.

In those awkward pauses of silence that happen when we talk. I really wanted to ask: "Could I just sit here and stare at you?"

._____.

u know something's wrong when you start catching yourself typing "lose" as "love".

Even if I hit my head and lost my memory, your name would still be echoing inside.

Translation: I think about you a lot. LIKE, A LOT. I'm just shy about saying it.

Even though it hurts everytime i fall down, i still get back up to walk again. How can I tell you, that i am falling right now? And the only reason i'm walking is to get closer to you.

can't you see

I've lost my mind

I'm running out of time

can't you see

I'm looking for you

At a table for two

can't you see

I've been trying to call you

But my fingers never follow through

can't you see

I just wanted hang out

And talk to you

Silence.

why does it hurt so much...?

Maybe its because everytime, i give it all my attention, and i know its kinda bad, but nothing else seems to matter more. So when it goes away, it takes everything.

I won't sing. If i did, the whole world would die. So no, i wont sing for you. Because in the whole world, you're the one i really want to stay alive.

There's a warning on Pandora's box: "Once the gates open, there's no turning back. You may find escape once in awhile. But it is here to stay. You invited them in."

And so with rain, comes thunder.

Followed by lightning, and after

A rainbow with sunshine.

Then the winds start to blow, once more

The inklings of rain, they come

In those knowing droplets

Your only solace

Is the calm before the storm.

And all this. In the blink of an eye. Who's there not to tell you, that you've lost your marbles?

It's ironic that the light dims out during the night and yet there are so many creatures and beings still needing the light. Some creatures are sensitive in that they shy away when there's too much of it, but just the right amount brings out their majesty.

Tonight the moon shines in full swing. Somehow even the storm clouds have cleared and made way for its light to touch the earth. The nightingale softly chirps a serenade only to be joined by the distant howling of wolves. Fireflies dance along the river banks in a show of lights. Dancing in and out of sight as they hover through the tall tree trunks, their only rival is the moonlight seeping through the spaces between the leaves above them.

And here I am, sitting under a lemon tree. I'm just wishing that the last piece of this picture would fall into place. Come sit with me and I'll give you a story. It's kinda your story, because it starts with how this place is so much more beautiful with you in it.

You make me want to stay in bed forever. Because when you're not with me, at least i can dream about you.

and again

these four walls

are the only things

that i can turn to

everything else

just seems so distant

why god?

do you make me so

i build a thousand walls around myself

hoping that someone will come in

i lament to you

is there any such person?

And my bloody hands

are tired of the pricks

from tearing down the thorns

and i begin to fill with scorn

my faith withers

and rekindles

all at the same time

you fill me up

and bring me down

am i forever to be alone?

teach me love

send me an angel

and teach me to keep her

for i've learnt everything

but to take care of myself

1

There's a dam. It's somewhere far from the swirls of civilization and around the corner from the meeting point of all the greatest rivers of the world. Its kept far away from the knowledge of man. Thus saying, only a few people know about it. Sworn to secrecy, they seldom speak of it. Others, at first, knew about it. But talk grew less and slowly it drifted away into legend.

This dam is special. It holds the water of the world in one place. But by an almost alien technology, that water is suspended in mid air. It forms a huge sphere. Actually, there are several huge spheres in the vicinity. Each sphere is connected to one another and each has its own "clamp" to keep it in place. In the world of the future, space is the most expensive commodity. Even the intangible Internet needs physical servers to create "space". Technology has tried again and again to create more space by reducing the amount of physical space these servers require. But this dam, creates space in a way no other can.

The miracle of these "clamps" is not only that it levitates the water in place, but it also creates a remote gravitational pull that compresses matter, much like a black hole. But unlike a black hole, which in theory has unlimited space, these clamps can only hold a certain amount of mass. There's where the ingenuity of using several clamps in a connected manner comes into play. Each sphere is connected by veins of water. The water is constantly moving throughout a total of 3 spheres. This moving motion helps maintain equilibrium and lessens the constant mass that each clamp has to manage. This mechanism allows the 3 clamps to actually hold 3 times their normal capacity.

There's an image in my head, that i can't get rid of. That's my being.

There's a feeling inside of me, that i can't get rid of. That's my heart.

There's a lingering feeling of exploration, that i can't get rid of. That's my soul.

And then, there's that thing that happened, and i forgot about everything else. That's you.